Relationship status update
On unexpectedly not being single in Taiwan…
Before I left New Zealand, a couple of friends openly wondered about the “real” reason for my move to Taiwan:
- Was I running from something? (No.)
- Or running to someone? (No.)
It’s more simple than that: I just like being here. I feel comfortable and happy. I self-actualize every time I step out the door.
But with my friends’ cynicism in mind, in addition to confirming I’m still alive, this blog serves a secondary purpose: sharing why I love Taiwan.
Sometimes strangers will send feedback about these posts—telling me about their own experiences and teaching me more about Taiwan, or offering tips for daily life. I appreciate every message.
However, as an innately private person, having a wider audience prompts me to consider how much I want to share.
I second-guess whether I should write about getting trapped on a bidet, or blowing on my eyes, or my days of spending dangerously.
Today, on the one-year anniversary of my relationship, I’m second-guessing again. But I figure that, for friends who don’t already know, it’s good to share good news.
Here’s the story so far…
I had a bunch of goals for my first year in Taiwan. But as an introvert who’s happy alone, a relationship was never on the list.
It’s irrelevant to my overarching goal of gaining permanent residency—despite many Taiwanese telling me, on the topic of visas, “just marry a local!”
(I even received one offer of marriage, from a sympathetic friend.)
As I’ve mentioned before, for my first 12 months in Taiwan, I said “yes” to almost every social opportunity (excluding marriages of convenience). I wasn’t strategic about building friendships, just more open than my introverted tendencies usually allow—and it paid off.
In October last year, I said “yes” to meeting a new acquaintance for coffee at an outdoor cafe, 45 minutes from my apartment. Checking the timestamp on my photos, I see I arrived around 8:45pm.
We each paid the NT$200 (NZ$10) admission fee and claimed our drinks, then climbed the hill to watch a concert on one of the upper terraces.
Sitting back in plastic chairs, enjoying live music and a view across the valley, we talked non-stop.
When the band called out for requests, they noticed me—the sole foreigner—in the audience. The lead singer said the only English song she knew was Happy Birthday, so that’s what she sang.
It wasn’t my birthday.
Later, the band wrapped up and people began to leave. At around 12:45am, one of the staff came to apologize that they were closing. We hadn’t noticed we were the last people there, nor that we’d been talking for four hours.
Neither of us was looking for a relationship. It wasn’t one of my goals, and he was committed to caring for an acutely-sick parent. But there was a spark.
We became official two months later.
That was a year ago. Right now we’re on holiday in Singapore, meeting friends from New Zealand and celebrating our first anniversary together.
I like being unexpectedly not single in Taiwan.